Current Status: Wide awake
Food Consumed: Bad cheese pizza, too many Caramello Koalas
On The iPod: 10 Billion Years; Jonathan Boulet
Word Count: 2,000+ (Too focused to properly count)
Well. What a day of rollercoaster writing!
I started the morning too exhausted to contemplate writing. I ate a heap of sugar (in the form of caramel fudge and caramel-filled chocolate), downed a packet of protein in chip form and then set up my laptop to four hours of untouchable backup, which meant I had no choice but to either a) clean b) cook c) write longhand or d) do absolutely jack shit.
I chose the write longhand option (though the jack shit option was pretty appealing!) and it was one of the most painful writing sessions I’ve had in a while. Every word I put down on that paper I loathed. With a passion. I literally stopped and looked at every single word as they were written and I said to myself: “This is utter crap, what the heck are you doing?!”
But I didn’t give up. I set myself a goal of 1,000 words. I knew with the mood I was in that I wouldn’t make it, and in the end I only managed 3 or 4 pages full of mixed scenes that were really all over the shop – some were chronological with where I’d last left off, while others slotted in earlier in the novel and one slotted in later on in the piece. I wasn’t happy with any of it – and that’s the understatement of the century right there! But I didn’t give up.
After writing those pages I was so disheartened with my novel that all I wanted to do was to quit and never look at it again. I tried something new. I plotted. I tried to start a new first page for a new plot idea but that didn’t work, either. I’m too invested in the characters I have with “Times of Bright.” I can’t handle any new ones right now. I’m not ready to give up the old characters. I stopped the new plotting and I waited. I watched fishing on television (as therapeutic as I can get without actually getting out on the water and doing it for myself, which unfortunately wasn’t an option for me today). I listened to music and I daydreamed.
Finally, at 10:30pm, a breakthrough!
I’ve just typed up all my longhand from today, and it’s actually not as bad as I first thought. Granted, it always seems to be easier to make the words sound “right” when I type them up rather than when I write them out by hand. Maybe that has something to do with my hands not being able to keep up with my brain when I’m hand-writing, I’m not entirely sure. I’ve fixed up a couple of the major issues I had today, and while I know that what I’ve just added to the novel is far from perfect, I don’t hate it and I’m not so worried about it.
As the lovely Kylie Ladd said to me: “You can’t edit a blank page!”
What do you think the relationship is between longhand/typing and decent words?